Be Happy: Stay in the Now While Working on Achieving Goals

Love-yourself“If I weighed 10 pounds less, I’d have a boyfriend.”

In my hypnotherapy practice, these are the kind of limiting beliefs I hear.

“You do realize that having love in your life has nothing to do with your weight, right?” I always say. “There are plenty of single thin girls out there.”

It’s very common that people come in telling me that if they could lose a certain amount of weight, or if they had a certain amount of money, they would be happy.

For clients like these, my goal is to start boosting their self-confidence right away, so that they are able to embrace the fact that they are already worthy of feeling good, as well as getting what they want.

In my experience, people can lose perspective when they start working towards a goal. This might seem counterintuitive – after all, wouldn’t people become more driven when they have something to focus on? Sometimes, however, people get so focused on what their lives will be like in the future, once they have achieved their goal, that they find themselves becoming increasingly dissatisfied with what their lives are like now.

A healthy life is about balance. It is about enjoying the now, while preparing for a bright future.

About a year ago, I helped a woman overcome her fear of flying. This woman went from not flying at all, to flying to the other side of the world with multiple connections along the way.

After a few hypnotherapy sessions, she was able to do what she hadn’t been able to do in years. I could see the effects, even in her body language. She looked strong and confident with a very matter-of-fact air to her. I was very proud of her progress.

Months later, she came in with a different issue she wanted to resolve. As she sat before me telling me all about her big trip, I noticed that she didn’t once mention her previous anxiety and panic attacks. When I asked her about it, she casually shrugged her shoulders and said that she had been fine. A minute later, she was telling me about the new issue that had prompted her to come in. Her mind had already moved on.

While my client wasn’t unhappy to start with, she reminded me how our minds easily become focused on the next goal. While, yes, it is important for us to work toward and reach our goals, they are not the end-all of happiness.

True happiness comes from within. That is why it is important to be happy in the now, regardless of whether we get that new job, save that amount of money, or lose that amount of weight.

It’s important that we stay focused on the big picture, and really understand that our value as human beings has nothing to do with money, the praises of others, or our weight.

PHOTO: Rory MacLeod

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